Blog For Free!
Archives
Home
2004 October
2004 September
2004 August
2004 July
2004 June
2004 May
My Links
City of Fuji Site
tBlog
My Profile
Send tMail
My tFriends
My Images
Sponsored
Blog
|
| Engrish |
| 06.30.04 (6:11 pm) [edit] |
Not much to report here. We had a major storm system move in yesterday, and I experienced a thunder and lightening storm that lasted for about 6 hours. It was really weird...usually in Canada they move in within the hour. Not so in Japan. And in Shizuoka, they had a foot of water in the streets, so the trains got shut down, and it was all chaotic for a few hours.
I am starting a collection of pictures that I am taking on my cell phone of crazy Japanese stuff - mostly slogans, and the crazy English translations (also known as `Engrish`), but wacky stuff in general. First up is a sign I found on a vending machine:
Next, I have something that is unbelievably cool. Check out this car - is it not the smallest car you`ve ever seen?!
I was riding my bike at the time, and my bicycle wasn`t much bigger...just a one-seater, I believe, but it`s so tiny!
|
|
|
| |
| `A horse, a horse, my kingdom for a horse...` |
| 06.28.04 (6:38 pm) [edit] |
So on Saturday night the group of teachers from the Shizuoka district went out on the town for one of the teacher`s going away party. We hit up an izu-kaya, which is a traditional Japanese pub/bar. It`s essentially a big room with long tables and tatami mats, where you go and for a couple of hours you can order a few plates of food and as many drinks as you want. It`s a fun place, and by the end of the session usually you end up partying with everybody in the neighboring tables. It`s a lot of fun.
So by the end of the night, we ended up hanging out with these Japanese guys from the next table, and one orders a dish of...something. I ask him what it is, and he gives me the Japanese name - b- something, can`t remember. But actually, what it really is, is--
Horse meat.
And not just any horse meat.
Raw horse meat.
It looks like a pile of red meat, like you might get at Safeway. So far, I`ve had raw oysters, raw squid and raw tuna, so I thought, `Why not?` And downed a few pieces.
How does one describe the taste of raw horse? Well, it`s kind of chewy, and it has a fairly indescribable taste. But it`s not bad.
Until...until...on about my third piece, a terrible thing happened. Suddenly, every horse I`d ever cared about from television and the movies popped into my head. Black Beauty, Black Stallion, Mr. Ed, Seabiscuit...they were all there. I thought I was going to choke. But hey - you try swallowing when you`ve got a mental image of Mr. Ed going, `Pleeeeease don`t eeeeeat me!` in your head.
But it was still tasty.
|
|
|
| |
| An Unexpected Visitor |
| 06.27.04 (7:49 am) [edit] |
My doorbell rang this morning at 10:30am. I had just woken up, and was listening to music and trying to recover from the previous night`s isu-kaya experience (more on that in the next blog, only have a few minutes right now). I open the door, and there is a fairly formally-dressed woman, mid-fifties, standing there. She starts talking, so I quickly get across the idea that I don`t speak Japanese, at which point she starts gesturing and pointing up, the the floor above me (which I initially thought) or the sky or something. I think I know what this is about. Three days ago, I bought a CD player for my apartment. Just a small one, but I was going insane listening to nothing but the Japanese voices on the weird game shows and soap operas that are always on my TV, and I hate sitting in a silent apartment. To celebrate this melodic revelation, I had been playing my eclectic collection of music at extremely high volume (Beethoven`s 9th Symphony, Dave Brubeck`s jazz quartet, and Billy Joel being the most played). I figured this lady lived upstairs, and had finally had it with my music and was telling me to turn it down. So I say `Sumimasen` over and over (means `Sorry` or `Excuse me` one of 6 words I know), and finally she leaves.
Ten seconds later, another knock at the door. I open it, and with the aforementioned woman there`s a much younger lady who is standing there, wearing a formal dress and a huge bonnet on her head. She says, in hesitant English...are you ready for this? `Hello. We`re Jehovah`s Witnesses, here to spread the good word. May we come in?`
Whaaat?!
So here I am, half-asleep and recovering from a night of partying, wearing nothing but boxer shorts and a old, sweat-stained t-shirt, and I`m being asked to invite a couple of Jehovah`s Witnesses (who only speak minimal amounts of English) into my apartment. I politely declined, and the one who spoke English said she`d drop some pamphlets through my door next week.
Very strange...when I worked for the Hell`s Gate Airtram for one week a few summers ago, and I was living in this decrepid shack on the side of the TransCanada Highway...lo and behold, the second day I was there, a knock at the door, and there were two J-Witnesses. This place was in the middle of nowhere - I mean, the nearest town was about 20 km away, and you could count on one hand the number of inhabited dwellings that were closer. They sure track me down in the oddest of places.
I don`t really have a problem with that kind of thing - I mean, they`re out supporting what they believe in. I respect that, like I`d expect respect when I practice my own beliefs. It was just...really, really odd. Really, last thing in the world I expected on my doorstep.
|
|
|
| |
| Kids Say the Darndest Things |
| 06.25.04 (3:57 am) [edit] |
Linklater tested it. Cosby proved it. And today, I witnessed it.
I was teaching three classes today, and by the end of the third one I was getting a little cocky. Things were just going a bit too-well, and I was feeling a little over-confident, and I think the kids picked up on it (trying to get them to call me `Super-Sensai` may have tipped them off). At any rate, one little girl who was causing a bit of trouble (nothing serious, just kept trying to kill me by putting blocks around in strategic places so I could trip over them) got a little irritable after I told her for the twentieth time to behave. She got a big scowl on her face, and turning around, muttered something in Japanese to her classmates, of which the only word I could pick out was `Pinnochio.` The class abruptly burst out laughing.
I was oblivious. `What? Did she just call me Pinnochio?` The class is all grins.
Now I`m curious, and attributing it to the latest Disney craze that has sprung up over here with the release of `Finding Nemo.` So I ask, `Why? Why did you call me Pinnochio?`
Imagine my reaction at the reply from the little darling, in her haltingly hesitant- yet assertive English: `You have...big nose!`
There really is nothing quite as humbling as an insult from an 8 year-old.
|
|
|
| |
| Tokyo!!! |
| 06.21.04 (3:23 am) [edit] |
I got lost.
Well, technically, we all got lost - there were five of us on our little expedition, and nobody spoke fluent Japanese, and only one of us had been to Tokyo before. Still, we wandered around the subways quite a bit, and we saw a whole bunch of cool stuff. It was a great trip.
Took the shink in and got to Tokyo station by noon, and man is that place huge...there are so many subways and trains that go through there. Subway map is insane...so many coloured lines representing different subway routes, but there are an incredible number...and most of it is in Japanese, so we have to play `Match the Kanji` to try and figure out where we`re going.
I should note that Tokyo is a big city. Really big. And spread out. Like, we`d get on a subway for a half hour and still be in the downtown core of the city. It is just massive.
So I met up with Amanda, Shannon, Jeremy, and Adam, and we first went to this great big temple/shrine complex. It is the most visited shrine in all of Japan, and there is a huge marketplace near it and a beautiful park with lots of stone Buddhas around it. The temple itself was beautiful, with all of its ornaments and decor.
Then we took the subway and went to another covered street filled with shops...and nearby is this bridge that is one of the coolest things I`ve ever seen. I guess this bridge was the hang-out spot for a lot of high school kids, especially the alternative crowd, so there were always a lot of rather oddly dressed teens in the area. Anyway, it`s really close to this big tourist/shopping complex, so lots of foreigners ended up seeing them, and I guess were so amazed by the way some of these alternative/Gothic/punk rocker kids were dressing that they started taking pictures. At first the kids hated it, but over the past ten years they`ve really played it up and enjoyed their notoriety. Now this bridge is known world-wide, and it`s in all the guidebooks. You go there, and there are people dressed in all sorts of odd costumes...some are dressed like punk-rockers, some like Goths, some are dressed like Anime characters and ninjas...and all around are tourists snapping pictures and chatting with them - they love the attention and getting their picture taken. It was quite the scene...I chatted with this anime/ninja girl who had orange contacts and a sword, and we got our pics taken with her.
Then we hit up Shubuya, which is like the Times Square of Tokyo; the place you`ll recognize if you`ve seen any movie about Japan. If you`ve seen `Lost in Translation,` or even the poster for the film, it is where there is the huge TV screen with the dinosaur walking on it...it`s actually the biggest TV screen in the world. There`s people everywhere, and it`s such a great atmosphere. We had a coffee, then went to dinner, then just hung out. Eventually we drifted into this all-night club/bar, and just waited in there for a few hours until the morning, when the subways and Shinkansen start running again. I was really tired when I got home this morning, but it was an incredible trip. What better way to see one of the biggest cities in the world than to hang out all night in the downtown core?
Here`s some pictures!
Jeremy, Adam, and I in front of the big temple complex
Jeremy, Adam, and I with the ninja/anime girl
|
|
|
| |
| Classes and Nosebleeds |
| 06.19.04 (3:42 am) [edit] |
Had a bit of an odd day today. Still at that (relatively) far away school, and I only had two classes.
One was just insane. There were 12 kids, which was the largest class I`ve ever taught (usually it`s around 6 or 7), 6 year olds, and all but one were boys. It was just...crazy. They were running around, fighting, chucking blocks at each other, climbing on the tables...ugh. Try teaching them a language when they`re acting like that. Dante couldn`t devise a rival type of torture.
Then I had 6 ten year olds. That was better, except for a small incident. We were playing this ball game, and I guess two kids collided...one of them runs up to me and says, `Sensai, asdlfkjasdlfkjasdlfkjasld jf...` and points to his nose. So being the bright person I am, I reply, `Huh? Something wrong with your nose?` and at that moment, whoosh...it was like that scene in `The Shining` when the elevator doors open and blood floods the hallway. It just came out and out and out, bleeding all over the place. So after my first panicky and rather ignoble mental reaction (I felt a little guilty and nervous, because my game was responsible...so my first thoughts were, `Chop him up in little pieces and hide them in the floorboards after the rest of the kids leave. No one needs to know what went on here today.`), I got him holding his head back with a tissue, and called head office to report it (they`re very sticky about any kind of injury, no matter how small; they always check up on it and call the parents, etc.). But everything was okay.
Tomorrow I`m meeting up with a few people in Tokyo, and gonna expore the Big City for the next day or two. Ten to one there`s going to be a blog posted here on Tuesday night that says I got lost.
|
|
|
| |
| Of Miscreants and Bidees |
| 06.16.04 (3:53 am) [edit] |
It was a day of firsts. One good, one disturbing.
I started a new school this week, and have been riding my bike every day. It`s a long ride - about 10km, mostly uphill (it`s closer to the foothills of Mt. Fuji), but it`s cheaper than transit, and besides, it`s a great workout.
I had to teach two new Circle classes for the first time today. Basically, they`re pre-pre-preschool classes, where once a month moms bring their really young kids to get an introduction to the school. Thankfully I had a Japanese teacher there to assist me, because these kids were really young. Like, the youngest was 6 months old, and the oldest was about 2.
Yikes.
Fortunately, they were pretty good. They obviously don`t care about learning English at that age, and were more interested in eating crayons and crawling over each other. An interesting aspect of Japanese culture did come in to play, however, that I only noticed due to the parents being present.
A co-worker told me that some parents take a very lax perspective on disciplining kids. In fact, and I quote, `some see them as little gods - they can do no wrong,` and indeed a lot of discipline seems to come from the teachers at school (which explains some of the behavioural problems). Most of the time this isn`t a big issue - for us, anyway - as they are so young and they are constantly being watched, so they won`t get into that much trouble. Most of the time.
One kid today, however, was committing some, shall we say, questionable activities. More to the point, he was trying to staple his worksheet to his mother`s hand. And the mom, thinking he`s a darling little prince, keeps moving the stapler away, and the little guy goes and grabs it again, persisting in his stapling-attempts. This goes on for several minutes, and eventually the mom looks up and says, with a great big grin, `He keeps trying to staple it to my hand...I guess he doesn`t want me to leave without his beautiful picture.`
No. He keeps trying to staple it to your hand because he wants to see a piece of sharp metal sticking out of your flesh. Because he`s a malicious little miscreant.
I know I`m a bit harsh, but I can`t look at these kids and NOT imagine what they`ll be like when they grow up. Usually you can spot them main demographics - the keeners, the troublemakers, the quiet ones. And the evil ones.
I can hardly wait until the twerp gets to his teens and he turns into one of those sadistic little creepazoids who get their kicks out of pouring cyanide into duck ponds and torturing family pets with BB guns. And his mom will still make excuses. `Oh, no, he was aiming for the pop cans. Fluffy just jumped in the way. All nine times.`
Okay, okay, so I don`t really mean it - I`m being deliberately facetious and cynical. Anyway, the classes went well, and nobody was seriously injured (although the aforementioned little bundle of joy did belt one girl over the head with a wooden block).
My other first today was much less...notable. I had my first run-in with a bidee.
Now, normally I wouldn`t really make it a point to describe such an event, but the circumstances surrounding the incident demand documentation.
I had stopped at this little restaurant on the ride home from work, pretty much a Denny`s-esque diner. After ordering, I went in to use the washroom. Now, I touched briefly on the Star Trek imagery used in some of these toilets, what with the buttons and the control panel and all. But I had never been adventurous enough to try it. Until today.
So, from the safety of the other side of the stall, I slowly pressed one of the buttons. Nothing happens. I try them all - nothing. Oh, well - must be broken, thinks I. So I sit. And whilst sitting, my hand wanders almost subconsciously to the control panel, and I idly press a button.
Now, I`m assuming there is some kind of sensor that can tell if someone is sitting on the toilet or not, that wasn`t triggered upon my first attempts. It was now, and I had switched it on. And this was not some piddly little water-fountain I had managed to turn on. Oh no, no, no.
I don`t know what weirdo was in there before me, but that spray of water was set to HIGH for both temperature and pressure. In terms of temperature, I mean, only a bit below scalding. In terms of pressure...you know those really big water-guns that come out in Wal-Mart about this time of year? Like the Super Soaker Extreme B5200, with the dual water tanks and like 500 psi? That`s the kind of water pressure we`re dealing with, folks.
I yelled. I admit it, I shrieked like a school girl. But I have to say that I learned on this day that there are few things more scream-provoking in this life than an unexpected jet of super-hot-water up the rear-end. I think the cook heard me in the kitchen - he probably thought I had some weird intestinal disorder, because there seemed to be an awful lot of lettuce on my dinner plate when it was served.
Anyway, so here I am, hot water up the wazoo, and I start to panic. I mean, it`s not a pleasant feeling, but I don`t want to just jump up because I`m sure the water will hit the ceiling and flood the whole bloody restroom. And that would be embarassing. So I start pressing buttons frantically, trying anything to stop this high-pressured water.
Thankfully, the water stops. In its place I get...the dryer. You got it, folks - these toilets have an air-dryer. And that was better than the water, but again, some freakazoid had cranked up all the levels, and what I got was like superheated air coming out of an industrial air-compressor. Now I know what a tire feels like.
I eventually got the whole bloody thing switched off, and got out of that washroom as quickly as possible. Quite an adventure, but not one I`d care to repeat anytime soon. I have two friends, Mardy and James, who are coming to Asia in the next few weeks. And I have some words of wisdom for you two:
Don`t randomly push buttons on control panels next to toilets.
|
|
|
| |
| Nothing Really Interesting |
| 06.14.04 (4:02 am) [edit] |
Had a good weekend. I worked on my apartment yesterday - cleaned it up, finally, and tidied it up so there`s not suitcases and papers everywhere. Then this morning I went and bought a desk for $20, along with some posters, etc.
Went for a long bike ride today, about 3 hours, into a neighboring town called Fujinomiya. Most of the way there is uphill, as it`s in the foothills of Mt. Fuji. I found my new school, so I`ll be able to bike if the weather is good, and I feel up to it (I much prefer the exercise to the train and a bus that I would normally have to take to get there).
Nothing else really of import. Had nice weather today - hot but not muggy. Hope it doesn`t rain, though we`re in that season.
Harry Potter comes out in theatres over here in two weeks, so I`ll definitely be hitting up a theatre and pay $20 to see it...bloody price-gouging.
Oh, and I got a call from one of the other trainees today, and we`re going to go into Tokyo next weekend and check out one of the Biggest Cities On Earth. He knows someone in the city, too, so looks like we`ll crash overnight and take the early shinkansen (bullet train) home the next morning.
|
|
|
| |
| My First Rant! I must be getting used to this country... |
| 06.08.04 (5:16 am) [edit] |
So far, I`ve been pretty laid-back about some of the differences between Japan and North America. I`ve accepted most of them with interest, some with humour, but rarely have I gotten actually irritated.
However, there is something that is driving me insane about this country. How to explain...
On our first day of training, someone remarked that pedestrians rarely, if ever, seem to jaywalk. One of our instructors replied that `They patrole themselves.` This is indeed correct - for no matter how nonexistant the traffic, no matter how short the distance...[b]pedestrians will not break the law to jaywalk[/b]. Indeed, if we foreigners do so, we are sometimes met with calls of `Bacca gaijin!` (`Stupid foreigner!`).
Now, many would comment that this isn`t really an annoyance of the country. Indeed, it is quite a testament to the level of lawfulness present; most people aren`t willing to break the law as far as crossing a street, let alone stealing a car. But this ties in to my main irritation here:
Ambulances.
That is, the fact that ambulances will not break the speed limit. They don`t. I`m not exaggerating - it`s fact, and at least two of my instructors mentioned it in training, aside from what I`ve seen. [i]Ambulances do not speed.[/i]
I don`t know why I didn`t blog it before, but the night of our last training session (a week ago last Saturday), a group of us went out partying in Nagoya. About 1am, we were standing outside a Yoshinoya place (fast food noodle joint), and I noticed a guy dragging another guy from the street. Little odd, thought I, so I went over to check. Turns out that a motorcyclist had hit a pedestrian. The motorcyclist was standing over the hurt guy talking on his cell phone, and looking stunned, so I ran back and grabbed my fellow gaijin (who actually knew some Japanese, and First Aid to boot - which brings up another point told to us in our Safety Course we had to take during training: people in Japan just generally don`t know First Aid. I`m not being discriminatory; this is what my instructor told us, including, and I quote, `Anybody who`s seen a full season of E.R. knows more First Aid than most people here, so help out whenever possible.` But I digress.). The guy wasn`t hurt seriously - probably a concussion, though he was unconscious when we found him - and the guy on the motorcycle was on the phone to the ambulance. So we waited, while Rachel and Mike checked the guy for signs of major trauma and injury, and tried to get him to say something.
And we waited.
And we waited.
By my watch, it was [i]at least [/i]15 minutes before an ambulance arrived, and I would estimate at it being closer to 20 (I only started keeping track of the time after what I thought an unreasonable ambulance response time had passed). Now, this is not some out-of-the way area - this is Sakae, an area of downtown Nagoya - the commercial district of the third largest city in Japan. And we waited 20 minutes.
Imagine it taking a quarter of an hour to reach an accident on the corner of Granville and Smythe in Vancouver.
I realize I`m ranting about this, but today, sitting in the rain atop my aforementioned Ugly Old-Fashioned Bike, I heard a siren and watched an ambulance drive down the street. Slowly. Because the speed limit was 50 km/h, and despite the fact that there was almost no other traffic...despite the fact that almost any other drivers, even the law-abiding Japanese drivers, would have driven faster, let alone in an emergency situation...despite that, they would not go any faster. I probably could have biked to the scene faster, for crying out loud.
Phew. That feels better. :lol:
Anyway, teaching went well today. Had a couple of little gremlins who tried to play, `Nail Sen-sai With A Plastic Ball` but I quelled that in a hurry.
And I watched the NHL final in Japanese. Too bad - I was really rooting for Calgary.
|
|
|
| |
| First Week in Fuji |
| 06.06.04 (4:52 am) [edit] |
And it has been a good week.
The kids I`m teaching have been great. One nose bleed, two `criers,` and a few troublemakers have been the only tough spots. The kids are great, though.
The apartment seems to get bigger every day. My Performance Supervisor came over to take a look, and was blown away at how huge it is. I have most of it unpacked now, and I have my TV set up. Oddly enough, I get two specialty channels - one that shows all English movies, and another that shows - get this - the hockey games!!! So what if they start at 6 in the morning...go Flames go...although the Japanese commentary is really bizarre. It so different from guys like Dan Russell...very calm, expressionless. Think North American golf commentary. Weird.
The people have been great, too. Met up with several teachers and both of my supervisors. In fact, we all went out partying on Saturday night. There is a foreigners bar called the Land of Oz (used to be owned by an Australian), and there was a huge dance there. Had a great time, met lots of great people. Fun times.
I also bought a bike...it is this ugly old blue granny bike with a basket, but it`s better than walking.
Today I had a day off, so I went to a neighboring town called Shimizu. There`s a big shopping complex like the North Van. Quay, or Granville Island Market, with a huge movie theatre up top. Went and saw `Day After Tomorrow`. The theatres have arranged seating - when you buy your ticket, the clerk takes out a map and you pick which seat you want. Just brilliant! Oh, and it was a decent movie, too.
|
|
|
| |
|
|
